For those thinking the Dixie Carter heel turn / best for business rip-off storyline couldn’t get any worse. It just did. In the second show from Little Rock, Arkansas, it came time for Hulk Hogan to decide whether he wanted to “take a ride on the Dixie train” and re-sign with the company.
In a cringe-worthy performance that by all reasoning was supposed to be awful, Carter attempted to flirt with the Hulkster and butter him up with a watch from Tiffany’s. She naïvely proclaimed that she could take his career to new heights, and although Hogan agreed that as a power couple they could do great things, he quit and walked out amidst cheers and “we want Vince chants”.
The closing frame showed Dixie literally clutching at Hulk’s leg like a toddler as he left down the ramp.
I still cannot fathom what they are trying to accomplish here. Is Dixie supposed to be a clueless and desperate failure? She keeps mentioning her bad decisions, but then trying to deflect them by essentially saying she knows what’s best for business. For those that dislike WWE’s current storyline, at least Triple H and Stephanie have confidence. The Dixie Carter character is pathetic, and sadly that’s what many people think of her in real life. Who the hell convinced her that this was a good idea? Is it some kind of Bischoff/Hogan/Lagana inside joke? Or do they honestly think that this kind of quasi-realism is entertaining?
If the company sucks, the worst thing you can do is promote that it sucks in a “shoot” storyline.
What’s the end game? That AJ wins the title and proves to Dixie that he’s not marginal and she’s as worthless as we all think she is? Well good job, why should we be watching again?
Or is Eric Bischoff and Hogan going to return in some bullshit self-serving swerve to “save” TNA from idiot Dixie?
I’ve defended TNA for years. But this … this really is crappy death of WCW type nonsense.
Lei’D Tapa and Derrick Bateman “Ethan”
Lei’D Tapa returned to the promotion this week after just one poorly produced promo package and proceeded to completely stink up the joint. Due to TNA’s restructuring and quest to bring in “the best talent in the world” (financial issues) they’ve decided to hire the absolute worst out of all the female Gut Check hopefuls. Tapa could barely get her leg high enough to connect with Velvet Sky while she screamed unconvincingly and hilariously. After hitting a Samoan Drop she uttered something along the lines of “my rage” “my ring, my island.”
Tapa may end up building on this early impression, but so far she is nothing more than Rhaka Khan with fuzzy hair trying to be Awesome Kong.
One fresh face that will be exciting to see is former NXT standout Derrick Bateman as “Ethan” – a fashion conscious egomaniac according to the promo videos.
October 03, 2013, TNA Impact Results:
– In an in-ring promo AJ says he knows exactly who Bully Ray is: “the man I’m going to beat to be the next World Heavyweight Champion.” He said hasn’t seen the title in over a year, and is hungry to get what he wants.
Bully soon interrupted Styles and suggested Dixie was inside his head. “You aint gotta be worried about her, you’ve gotta be worried about me,” screamed Ray.
He told AJ to look at what he did to Hogan, Sting, Hardy, Mr. Anderson, and Devon. “What do you think I’m gonna do to you?”
Ray reminded AJ that he beat him two years ago in a Last Man Standing match and he has nothing left that he wants. What he does want is to take him away from the fans.
Presumably this is because after Bound for Glory he won’t have a contract nor any reason to stay in the company, but this was not adequately explained on air.
AJ revealed that tonight Bully will have to face Samoa Joe.
– Backstage Dixie Carter had AJ escorted from the arena.
– Jeff Hardy & Manik def. Chris Sabin & Kenny King, when Hardy hit the Swanton. After the match Austin Aries who was on commentary proposed a 4-way match at BFG, minus Kenny King (so what was the point in their confrontation last week?) Hardy had a better idea … Ultimate X!
– Hulk and Sting agree that Dixie is drunk with power. Hogan revealed a watch that she had sent him, which Sting said he got last year. “Bischoff never gave me anything,” quipped the Hulkster.
– Magnus says he’s gonna make EGO pay one by one in gauntlet.
– Magnus def. Daniels after he missed the BME.
– Magnus def. Kazarian when he reversed the Fade to Black in to a Texas Cloverleaf.
– Bobby Roode’s entrance distracted Magnus, allowing Kazarian to hit a chop block on his knee. When Magnus went for another Cloverleaf, Roode hammered the bad knee to escape, before dodging a Top Rope elbow and locking in the Crossface. Just before Magnus could get to the ropes Roode pulled him back and applied the Ankle Lock for the win.
– After the match Magnus snapped with frustration and refused to go to the back to talk it over with Sting. He pondered whether he just doesn’t have it in him to get to the level the MEM expect. “Ric Flair made you, but who will make me?” says Magnus. Sting replied … “Me, I will at Bound For Glory!”
– Sabin says he won’t accompany Velvet to the ring tonight because he has to think about himself.
– Backstage EGO are celebrating and announce that Bobby Roode will be inducted in to the Hall of Fame … the EGO Hall of Fame. Instead of playing the no-nonsense guy, Roode acted as if it was a real honor.
– Austin Aries gives Hogan some Vegan Vitamins and says his decision tonight is really “black and white”.
– Velvet Sky vs Brooke Tessmacher ends in a No Contest when Lei’D Tapa interfered and gave Velvet a big boot. She followed up with a Samoan Drop.
– Samoa Joe def. Bully Ray via DQ when Ray used the chain. He goes to Piledrive Joe on the concrete but AJ is back in the building and makes the save.